Undercover Billionaire ...

THESE BASTARDS STOLE MY IDEA!

Remember a long time ago I wrote a post wherein I suggested someone use MY idea for a reality show?  My idea was to take a bunch of millionaires, give them a salary of $30,000/yr and tell them to live on that for a year. IN CALIFORNIA. With that $30k they have to pay rent for a shithole apartment (in Cali a two bedroom shithole apartment can easily go for $2,500/mo. - and I said "apartment" because on that salary you could NEVER afford to buy a shithole house because shithole houses easily go for $500k and up), then you need to buy food, pay utilities, insurance, cable, cell phone, and deal with real life issues like a layoff, or a sick kid, or a car that keeps breaking down, rent going up every other year, and NEVER getting a raise, and having to work for an asshole at a job you can't quit because you need to live.  Then, for extra laughs, tell them to save money for a vacation or to start a business ... THAT I'd pay to see!  

Undercover Billionaire.  Here's the premise.  Each billionaire is given $100 dollars.  THAT'S IT.  They are then sent to a city where they will have to find shelter for the night and eventually, a place to live, and then proceed to set about to build a $1 million dollar business WITHIN 90 days.  They cannot utilize their own names, they cannot use any of their contacts.  They have to do it ALL with $100 and start from scratch.  They have to succeed in 90 days simply on their talent, their wits, their confidence and smarts proving to us (the downtrodden people who are too lazy to start up a million dollar business that is successful) ... that the American dream is alive and well.  YEAH.   

After laughing for 20 minutes, I couldn't help but watch.

Here are the billionaires:

GRANT CARDONE

 

This former drug addict (aren't they all?) is now addicted to landing business deals… the type of deals that have generated riches for him and those who follow his principles. According to Grant, no matter what business you’re in, you’re in sales. Grant’s the author of eight best-selling business books, the founder of the 10X movement, and he sells out massive arenas all over the world for audiences eager to listen to his money-making wisdom.

Grant was sent to Pueblo, Colorado with $100 and a dream to succeed in 90 days.  He somehow scored free sleeping arrangements from a guy who sells RVs.  He started out gang-busters but by day 3 could not believe he'd had no luck making any contacts whatsoever.  I'm sure as "Grant Cardone" when he walks into someone's office with his Armani suit and deep dark tan people listen.  As a regular guy with no capital every business owner he met with was not impressed -- and quite frankly, Grant came off as a moron.  He literally cried because no one was taking him seriously.  Did you read that?  HE CRIED.  SMH.

IT'S CALLED REAL LIFE GRANT.  Nobody loves you when you're down and out.  

MONIQUE IDLETT

Monique went on to become the brains behind the Mosley Music Group, in partnership with her now ex-husband Tim “Timbaland” Mosley, where she was responsible for managing the successful careers of such high-profile artists as One Republic, Nelly Furtado and Chris Cornell.

Monique took her $100 and was sent to Tacoma, Washington.  Figuring that the Church was a good place to start in order to find shelter for the night, a kindly pastor paid for her to stay at a nice hotel for three days on HIS CREDIT CARD.  What a saint.  (And P.S. this bitch BETTER pay him back!) After three days Monique was losing hope.  She had to leave the hotel and still had not made any important contacts.  At one point she calls her mother and cries on the phone and tells her she just wants to go home.  AFTER THREE DAYS.  SMH.  
IT'S CALLED REAL LIFE MONIQUE.  Nobody cares that you used to be married to a rap star.

ELAINE CULOTTI

She’s a self-proclaimed “100 percent badass” who has developed and built everything from luxury homes to casinos and hospitals. Elaine moves forward with intense determination, no visible fear of failure, and an uncanny ability to get her way.  (P.S.  I can tell you right now .... this is one bitch you don't want to work for!)

Elaine took her $100 to Fresno, California.  After trying to find a hotel room for the night she could not believe that she couldn't find one for under $100!  (eyes rolling) ... Elaine, you've been rich too long.  THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS A HOTEL ROOM FOR UNDER $100.  She finally scored a room from an Inn for $25/night and then worked out a deal with the manager to pay the $400 monthly fee for the room by working for him for free.  She then got a job working in the fields loading fruit in 97 degree heat for $15/hr.  She hasn't had much luck either.  She has been cruising all over Fresno looking for an old building to buy and an investor to go in with her because SHE HAS NO MONEY to either buy or renovate it.  

Keep in mind that the cameras are filming them and so the regular folk they converse with are much more likely to be kind.  If I tried to score free sleeping arrangements in an RV park how successful do you think I'd be? Truthfully, I think most people, on their own, are kind.  But not people who have businesses that they need to protect.  NO ONE IS GOING TO LET A STRANGE MAN SLEEP IN ONE OF YOUR RVs FOR FREE FOR WEEKS ON END.  EVER.  

I'll keep y'all posted.  

UPDATE:  Grant Cardone, the Wizard of Riches is now being investigated for Fraud.  All these F***RS are nothing but a bunch of shysters.

 

RANDOM STUFF

I don't like competition. Never have. It's everywhere of course and we must compete for every damn thing in life which I find horribly exhausting.  Even on TV that is all we see. Competition, competition, competition. You're better, you're lousy, you did it, you didn't. Eight out of 10, 2 out of 6. Scores, rates, evaluations. Dancing with the Stars, The Biggest Loser, American Idol, X Factor, even competition shows to find your future spouse (LONG, LOUD SCREAM).

I find all of this competition on TV so ironic considering how the last generation of kids were raised ... indulged, loved, encouraged, patted, petted, always got a hi 5 and a "good job!" for eating their fucken cereal. Oy.  Let's go back to my childhood when kids were kids and adults were adults and no one gave a crap how a 10 year old felt. IT BUILT CHARACTER PEOPLE!

1966. Me, Arnie, Georgie and Eddie sitting on the curb outside staring at the Sun to see who could do it the longest. After burning our retinas out we decided to have a screaming contest. After three minutes of screaming Tia Chata comes outside in her house dress with a cigarette screams louder than the four of us together ....

"SHADDUP!!!!!!!"

NOTE: She didn't think someone had been hurt, run over by a car, or lost an eye. All she knew was that we were bugging the shit outta her and she had HAD IT. These were the moms in the 1960's. They didn't care about about our fragile little egos. If we lost a game and started crying we didn't get medal for "participating" ... a mom would just bark something like "don't be such a crybaby! Go outside and play dammit!" then back in the house she'd go as she took another drag on her cigarette.

And we were okay with that. No one grew up psychologically damaged.
No one was ruined for life. We bounced back just fine and figured out another game to play ... "I know you guys ... let's play parade!" This game consisted of sitting on the curb and clapping every time a car drove down the street. And this was a shitload of fun to us. If our parents were like parents today they would have been gushing and oohing over our brilliant, creative little minds and would somehow turn that into a scholarship to university because the child showed inherent ability to moderate the flow of traffic at different times during the day which would then allow for a psychological profile of not only drivers, but bystanders as well, and then a study would prove that ....*#*@&p)!!!!!  It's so damn insane.


Have you seen the Super Nanny?  Yet another reality based program that helps parents learn how to parent ... don't even get me started.  I happened to catch an episode once. What a disaster.  The kids in this particular family ran the entire household and the mom and dad were completely useless. In one unbelievable incident little Johnny was screaming his head off having a conniption fit because he didn't want to drink his milk unless he was able to do so while sitting on his dad's shoulders. Next shot:  kid sitting on dad's shoulders calmly drinking his milk. O.M.G.

This would NEVER happen at our house.  

Manzanar Avenue, circa 1965.  If one of us didn't want to do something my dad would proceed to take his belt off with a menacing sneer "orale veras!" (translation: you're gonna do exactly what I tell you to do you little bastard or else!) No bargaining, no reasoning, no B.S. You know why? BECAUSE HE WAS THE DAD AND YOU WERE THE KID. Period. End of story.

I can recall many a madcap chase through the house mom yelling "don't run away from me you little shit!"  For years I thought that was my name.  And forget the world's greatest pitchers ... Mexican mother sitting on a couch ... my mom could throw a brush and make it round a corner and cock you right on the back of your head.  Swear.  

*SIGH* ... how I long for those good old days when kids were kids and adults were adults.  Kids today won't have stories like mine.  They're all so loved and well adjusted and brimming with self-esteem.  It's just not right I tell you. 

PETE DAVIDSON ...

Well, apparently it's official.  Pete Davidson is now dating the pretty actress from Bridgerton.  WTF.  

Does this guy have a magic schlong or what?  He has been with some of the most beautiful women in Hollywood and he's BUTT UGLY.  I mean seriously everyone this is a face only a mother could love, 

He has dated the following:

The BEAUTIFUL Kaia Gerber 

Kate Beckinsale

I don't get it.  When I was young I didn't have a "type" .... I could be attracted to anything about a guy,.  A good personality, a sense of humor, short, tall, etc.,  ... BUT NEVER UGLY.  I HAD STANDARDS. 

2021 OSCAR CEREMONY ...

Ok ... Oscar Awards held at L.A. Union Station this year.  As a native Angeleno, L.A. Union Station is really quite beautiful.  I've been there many, many, MANY times.  I like they way they decorated the outside area where people gathered and were able to sit and schmooze.  It was a very chill atmosphere.  BUT ... where were all the movie stars?

Maybe it's all due to Covid and the last year being crazy and all, and then throw in 4 years of Trump and the world has turned.  I seem to be in another dimension .... I don't know who most of these actors and actresses are????

WAIT!  Paulina Porizkova is dating Aaron Sorkin?  

So I LOVE Zendaya!  She always nails it.  Love the beautiful yellow gown with those amazing diamond necklaces.  I don't know why but it evokes a very Egyptian feel to me.  Love the way her hair is blowing in the breeze.  Grade:  A+

NEXT ... Halle .... Ms. Berry if you're nasty.  I love the color of this gown.  Love Halle's hair but she could have schuzzed it up a little with some jewels.  No necklace, no earrings, no bracelet, not even a ring.  Halle usually always looks great.  I give her an A-  It would have been an A if she'd had some bling.  Grade:  A-

Regina King.  Not feeling the wings.  This looks more like a costume than a gown.  Grade:  C-

Emerald Fenner won Best screenwriting for Promising Young Woman which was a FANTASTIC MOVIE.  Emerald however could have chosen her gown with more care. This is an ugly bridesmaid dress.  She also could have done something with her hair.  Ms. Fenner ... you're getting a D-

Angela Bassett -- SLAMMIN!  Angela always nails it.  I only have one critique -- I didn't dig the blue eye shadow.  Other than that, this is a winner.  A+

P.S.  Did you notice how all the winners got gallons of time for their speeches?  

Andra Day ... it's a thin line between sexy and tacky.  You look tacky.  Sorry.  Grade:  F-

OK.  This is a lady I never heard of.  Celeste Waite???  Is she an actress?  A guest?  I don't know.  With regard to her fashion choice I'm feeling Alice in Wonderland ... the Red Queen .... And her purse is a heart.  Not like a valentine heart, but a human heart with ventricles and everything.  Grade:  D-

Glenn Close.  Glenn luv ... pants or a dress.  Make up your mind.  Also, the gloves need to go.  And so do those Payless pumps.  Grade:  F

A Thought ... Didn't it seem like each nominee was seriously getting their ass kissed?  

Coleman Domingo.  Clearly a man not afraid to take chances.  Grade:  B (for Pepto Bismol.)

Carey Mulligan and spouse.  The gown photographs beautifully but she really needed a little bling.  Grade:  B-

Laura Dern.  P.S.  Did you see her standing next to Reese Witherspoon?  MY GOD she's TALL.  I usually say you can never go wrong with black and white.  BUT, I didn't mean white ostrich feathers.  Hair would have looked much better if it were up, loose and sexy.  Grade:  C

I find Margot Robbie incredibly beautiful.  I love this gown.  Her hair and makeup are perfection!  Grade:  A

The super talented Olivia Coleman.  Olivia ... YOU'VE GOT TO GET A STYLIST.  Grade:  F-

Maria Baklova, the star of the latest Borat movie and witness to Rudy Giuliani tucking his pants in while lying on a bed. 

She looks like a bride.  Not feeling the necklace.  Hair could have been sexier.  Grade:  C

Questlove in ugly mask and golden crocs.  Grade:  F-

The incredible Viola Davis looking beautiful in white.  Grade:  B.

Reese Witherspoon.  I actually really like this.  Her make up is perfect and I love her hair long and loose.  Grade:  A.  

Amanda Seyfried in red.  Amanda looking very 1930's glam.  Grade:  A

Glenn Close doin DA BUTT?  I have now seen everything.

RITA MORENO!  GOD I LOVE HER!  One bad ass Latina!

So unfortunately ladies and germs, that's it.  This definitely was not a star-fest.  NO ONE SHOWED UP except the nominees. 

Here are my thoughts.  Covid has changed the world.  When movies could no longer be seen in the theatre and everyone was watching first rate movies on T.V. at home Hollywood and all that it encompasses lost it's allure.  There is no more mystery.  And when you have influencers on  Instagram making millions of dollars for doing nothing, there is nothing special about being famous anymore.  All the excitement and specialness has gone and doesn't appear to be returning anytime soon.

As for the movies that were nominated I saw Mank.  It was OK.

I saw Ma Rainey's Black Bottom - didn't like it.  Don't get why it was nominated.

Judas and the Black Messiah.  It was good.  

Promising Young Woman - LOVED IT.  I love a good payback story.

Trial of the Chicago 7 - it was like a made for TV movie.  

Nomadland.  Mhmm .... didn't really relish watching Frances McDormand taking a crap in a bucket.  

So these are my thoughts.  What are yours?

Maybe next year will be different.  Maybe next year we will no longer have to wear a stupid mask everywhere.  Maybe next year we will actually be able to go into a restaurant and order drinks and sit next to people.  I sure hope so.

Until then, take care peeps!

SMOOCHES!

J-LO and A-ROD ...

 Told ya.

“We have realized we are better as friends and look forward to remaining so.”

“We will continue to work together and support each other on our shared businesses and projects. We wish the best for each other and one another’s children. Out of respect for them, the only other comment we have to say is thank you to everyone who has sent kind words and support.”

YEAH, YEAH, YEAH.

He cheated, he lied, he told you he loved you.

Not even YOU J-lo can make a cheater faithful.  

NEXT ...

We will be holding auditions for J-lo's next boyfriend.  Must be good looking, between the ages of 25 to 45.  Must be loaded ($$$$$$$) and comfortable being second banana.  

Gwyn ...

 Yet again.  

Gwyneth Paltrow’s latest Goop-y vibrator costs $135

If I was going to pay $135.00 for a vibrator I'd want a man attached to it.  

Hear me out for a second ... when I was a single gal I never owned one of these things because I was afraid if I suddenly died my parents might find it in my condo and I'd die of shame even though I was already dead ... dig?  I NEVER talked about such things with my girlfriends.  We did not mention shit like this.  If you needed to have sex with machinery you were looked upon as pathetic.  And I came of age during the crazy sex filled disco era of the 1970's. 

Even today I don't get it.  WHY would you openly talk about shit like this?  Sin vuerguenzas!

NEXT ...

Kourtney Kardashian and the tale of the Unedited Bikini Pic 

REGULAR KHLOE ...

PERFECT KLOHE ...

SIGH.  Isn't it time this family just disappeared into obscurity?

Then, after scrambling to get the unauthorized bikini pic off the internet pronto, Khole then immediately posted a video on Instagram to PROVE that she isn't photoshopped.  So what is it Khlo?  Do you care?  Or you don't care?  If you care, why the lecture on body shaming?  If you don't care, why do you have to let everyone see you in your birthday suit to PROVE you don't photoshop.  Please.  Get some help. 

MEAN TEACHER and other jerks ...

This lady right here ... Alyssa Rupp Bohenek is a MEAN TEACHER!  Apparently, she wrote the comment below on a little boy's paper.  Naturally, the little boy felt like crap and was afraid to go home and show it to his parents.  He is only 7 years old.

 

To tell a little boy that his work is PATHETIC is so damaging, so HEARTLESS, so MEAN that this broad should lose her job.  Now y'all know how I hate a bully and the worst kind of bully is a teacher who is a bully.  How does a 7 year old defend himself?! 

This lady should count her blessings that that little boy wasn't my kid because she wouldn't have any hair left after I got through with her.  

My fourth grade teacher traumatized me so badly that I would try to make myself barf every morning so I wouldn't have to go to school.  And I wasn't the only kid who did this.  EVERYONE hated this particular teacher.  I will not name her, but she had blonde hair and blue eyes that would bulge out of her head when she yelled at the class that would scare the f*ck outta everybody.  One look from her was enough to terrify a flying monkey.

YOU DO NOT BELITTLE OR HUMILIATE A CHILD.  EVER!

These bullies infiltrate all parts of society.  Whether it's the fiefdom of an elementary school or the international halls of business and commerce, they LIVE to be mean and controlling and all powerful (e.g., one Donald J. Trump).  I pray that one day this type of behavior will no longer be tolerated by adults in the work place, or the schoolyard, or the university.  All it does is make people feel like sh*t about themselves and then some a-hole takes a sawed off shotgun and massacres an entire office building.

I'm not "blaming" ... I am merely trying to state how damaging it is when a teacher belittles a student.  SUPREMELY damaging ... because one day that student might grow up to have a blog that is read by lots and lots of people and YOU just may be the subject of one her posts.  😈

Thank you.

NEXT ...

Lance Armstrong's son has been arrested for raping a 16 year old girl in 2018.  Apparently, the apple does not fall far from the tree.  When your father is an arrogant prick it seems inevitable that the son will follow.

Good luck dickwad.

Jennifer Lopez's exes Ben Affleck, Marc Anthony lavish praise on her 

... of course they do.

I wonder how much she paid them.  NEVER HAVE I EVER known of ANYONE who is SO obsessed with her public image.  SAD. 

 

Jen ... hun, you can try and try and try and try but A-Rod is still going to f*ck around and you will still break up.  Just deal with it.