MENOPAUSE

It's been raining heavily all day and freezing outside and all I wanna do is take off all my clothes and stand outside in the rain ... naked ... that is how HOT I am. OMG. This midlife b.s. is the worst. I cried on and off all afternoon. Why? No reason, and a million reasons. I was thinking about my mommie who passed away in December, 2005. Christmas has never been the same ... and I can't tell you any more because I'll start crying again ... then, I happened to catch a movie on t.v. ... Someone Like You with Ashley Judd and the most gorgeous man who ever lived, Hugh Jackman ... (except for Viggo of course ... despite the fact that he abandoned me for another woman who is now his new girlfriend and left me with a big ol broken heart). Sobbed through the entire movie. I've also been dealing with a nasty boil on the back of my thigh that hurts like hell. I never knew something could be so painful. I've been expending mountains of energy dealing with the pain and have been unable to walk like a normal person for the last four days. I feel fat, and sweaty and disgusting. OK OK - TMI. But I can't help it. When I write a post and put it "out there", I have no idea who will read it so it's almost like writing in a diary.

Any wise and wonderful ladies out there that have traveled down this road and care to share your stories, please do. Even though I have read all about these symptoms and women today are much more informed on all things female, when it happens to YOU, you still feel ALL ALONE because you're the one driving everyone around you crazy with your hormonal hysteria. It's so embarrassing.

Think about it ... in the life of the average woman, she will experience monthly periods/cramps/migraines/pregnancy/childbirth/PMS/

Menopause, all of it. If she lives to be, say 80 years old, she will have approximately 20 to 30 years of relative sanity. Ages 0-12 are great. Thirteen to 50 .... all the hell begins. After that, for approximately 5 to 10 years, you gotta deal with hot flashes, mood swings, crying jags, the works. Then ... you die. Not fair. Not fair at all.

SMOOCHES!