From Venting to Viggo

So, last night Dan and I went to one of our favorite eateries .... "Off the Hook Tacos" and believe me, the food there is definitely OFF THE HOOK!  BUT, while we were enjoying our appetizers and waiting for our main course there was a lady behind me talking and face timing her kid who was probably 5 years old hence the high pitched baby talk voice LOUD enough to disturb the entire freaking restaurant.  

And I wasn't just being my usual typical impatient bitchness.  I know EVERYTHING bugs the shit outta me ... if someone is breathing too loud I get pissed off.  But this broad was disturbing Danny and NOTHING disturbs Danny.  So I KNEW that I wasn't just being an impatient bitch.  This is what we had to endure for THIRTY-FIVE FUCKING MINUTES ...


HI mama!  
What are you doing?!
Happy Birthday!
You know what?  I'm going to go to your school tomorrow and bringing cupcakes!
Yes cupcakes!
Cupcakes yes!
Yes Cupcakes!
Unicorn Cupcakes!
Yes!
And tonight you and I will make unicorn cu…

SO, recently California passed a law wherein we now have to use our own bags every time we go to the market or CVS or Rite-Aid, or wherever.  If you don't take your own bags you have to purchase one for 10 cents.  So if you buy a shitload of groceries, you're now going to have to pay an extra 40 or 50 or 60 cents on top of that .... to help the environment.  HOWEVER, here's the really smart part.  The bags they sell you are made of .... wait for it .... PLASTIC.  you know ... to help the environment.

If you're smart like I am, you've already purchased plenty of bags with handles made out of something (not plastic) but sturdy and reusable.  I have them in my car.  And every time I go to the market or CVS or Rite-Aid I completely forget to take them into the store with me, ergo, I end up purchasing MORE PLASTIC BAGS.  California.  Why people want to come here I have no idea. 

Characters:  Receptionist











Secretary













Secretary receives call from her big important boss to have a name added to security.  Said gentleman will be arriving at our office in approximately one hour to have secretary (me) receive and scan closing documents in a big important deal.  I post haste, email receptionist to relay message giving receptionist name of gentleman and time he is arriving, WHY he is arriving and please call me (secretary) when he arrives.
Because Secretary has history with Receptionist (e.g., ignoring emails, not ordering lunch, etc.) secretary makes sure she has a notification in her Outlook that will notify her that receptionist has actually opened and read secretary's email.  Approximately 15 minutes later I receive this from receptionist …
All taken care.  It really helps speed these up if you put a date in your subject line. Thx.
Secretary ponders said message.  How to respond?  Should I respond?  Or should I ask her to refrain from smoking crack on the j…