I CAN'T STAND IT ANYMORE!!!!

I simply must address all these politicos who have fucked their way through life destroying the lives of countless people - usually women and children ... like their wives and kids. And yet, I also can't help but laugh at their ridiculous attempts to deflect when questioned by journalists, T.V. newspeople and the like. It is a rare gift to vomit forth words that HAVE NO MEANING WHATSOEVER IN CONNECTION TO WHAT THE HELL THE QUESTION IS. Case in point. Congressman Anthony Weiner, (D- NY) who took a picture of his weiner, but isn't sure if it was HIS weiner, because someone HACKED his phone and it might be his weiner, but then again it might not be his weiner, but it doesn't look familiar because he's not able to determine if the underwear is his or not ... but as for the weiner ... IT'S VERY SIMPLE MR. WEINER!!!! A SIMPLE YES or NO will suffice! WE'LL EVEN TAKE A NO COMMENT ... (And just so you know ... if I took a picture of my weiner I'd remember that) and, like most "regular" people, we don't do things like take pictures of our weiners and accidentally send them to people. Only highly intelligent and important people like you all do shit like that. Because most 'regular' people have this thing called a CONSCIOUS ... and FEAR of getting caught ... you know, stuff like that. UGH. John Edwards. Indicted on charges that he accepted $925,000 (that's almost $1 million bucks) from two supporters to hide his pregnant baby mama during his 2008 campaign for the presidency while his wife was dying of cancer. He plead "not guilty" and insisted that he "broke no laws". I don't even have words for this one. John, you are so fucken lucky I don't run the world. He insists that he will forever regret his decisions and the harm he's ..... EHHHH SHADDUP!!! Arnold to Maid: "I know, why don't you and I make the nasty and I won't wear a rubber or any kind of protection whatsoever because I am the Sperminator and my seed does what I tell it to do and we can do it right here in my house and nobody will find out because I have billions and billions of dollars that will buy the silence of my minions while I FUCK around on my wife of 25 years and destroy the mental/spiritual and emotional health of my four children ... HAHAHHAHAHA. Arnold ... I have this funny little saying that I wish I could shoot people for being assholes, but only for ten minutes. In your case I'd make an exception. I'd like to shoot you and you just STAY DEAD. OK? "I did not have sex with that woman ..." Liar, liar PANTS ON FUCKEN FIRE!!

Eighteen With a Bullet

When I was 18 I got my first real job working at a large savings and loan. I was hired as a clerk/typist and I worked in the training department. This was my first experience in the real world where everybody who was anybody in the corporate world was a white. In 1975 you rarely saw any people of color in supervisory positions and I soon began to experience what real prejudice felt like. I remember thinking to myself ... wow ... these people really think they're better than me ... and trust me, they were about as subtle as an elephant who just took a dump in your living room.

One of my bosses was a young girl from Ohio. She was about 27 to my 18 and was a college grad. I also naively, considered her my friend. I made this assumption because we shared boyfriend stories and talked about clothes and all the other girly things that female co-workers share. However, every now and then she would ask me if I could run to the corner liquor store and get her a pack of cigarettes. Sure! No problem. I’d done this for her several times, without question, never realizing what was really happening. The very real barriers which separated us were clearly being defined ... by her. One day, when I was super busy and was down to my last cigarette, I asked her if she would return the favor. She looked at me like I had three heads ... "no," she said "I’m too busy" ... just like that ... it couldn't have stung more than if she'd slapped me. And in that instant, I realized that she was never my friend. How could she be friends with someone like me ... an uneducated, unsophisticated, little Mexican-American girl who was just a clerk/typist. The realization of this fact was so humiliating to me and made crystal clear to me where she saw me on the totem pole of life ... WAY BENEATH HER. As hurtful as it was, I knew one thing for sure ... hell would freeze over before I'd ever get her a pack of cigarettes again.



There were two other secretaries I worked with in the training department. Carol was a divorced lady and was old enough to be my mother and was forever warning me about the dangers of dating musicians. Vicky, was divorced as well and was living in her own personal hell. Her ex-husband had kidnapped her children and she hadn't seen them in years. This was before there were laws about kidnapping your own children.  These two ladies and I were very close, mainly because we all endured the unending, horrible treatment of our boss, Training Director, Dell Dowdell.  I used to refer to him as "Dell Dildo" (behind his back of course).  To give you all a visual, Dell was kind of a Rush Limbaugh type with little tiny teeth.  He was arrogant and superior.  Dildo would hold meetings that were 4 and 5 hours long wherein he would say absolutely nothing.  After these excruciatingly long and boring meetings the three of us would exit his office shaking our heads from pain and wondering how the hell someone can yap yap yap for six F-ing hours and say nothing at all.  He was also a big proponent of psycho cybernetics.  This is basically a philosophy of the power of self-affirmation and mental visualization techniques which used the connection between the mind and the body.  Specified techniques to develop a positive inner goal as a means of developing a positive outer goal. This concentration on inner attitudes is essential to his approach, as a person's outer success can never rise above the one visualized internally.  It was all just a bunch of bullshit in my opinion because for all his professing and trying to teach this to us in my opinion he was still a fuckin asshole. 

Evie was our secretarial supervisor and the spawn of Satan. She was a divorced, pretty blond woman in her early 40's and I'm certain was a closet masochist. She once confessed to me that her sister had an affair with her husband. I have no idea what compelled her to tell me such a horribly personal secret ... we were hardly friends, and she basically treated me like crap the entire time I worked there. To take an 18-year-old kid into her confidence completely mystified me.


Evie got a perverse pleasure out of abusing all of us put seemed to get particular joy out of picking on me.  At least once a week I was summoned into Dildo's office where Evie would then “write me up” on everything from not being "dress code" and making me go home to change, to any number of meaningless infractions.  I hated Evie. I would lay awake at night thinking of ways to kill her.  I even entertained the idea of getting one of the guys in the neighborhood to do a drive-by.  I know it sounds terrible, but you would feel the same way too if you had to deal with this b*tch every day for a whole year. 


Once in a while, to lighten things up in the office, I would get the girls' attention as Evie was bending over a filing cabinet, and I would swing my foot back and forth like I was going to kick her right in her ass. This would always get the girls laughing hysterically to the point of crying because it is, after all, very difficult to hysterically laugh like that QUIETLY.    Evie would turn around, know something was up ... but she could never quite prove anything. And she never caught me.


Every day Evie would make me get her lunch. She would come to my desk, stand behind me with her money in her hand and recite her order. This went on for a loooooong time until one day, with all the courage I could summon, I told her that I could not get her lunch because I was working on a super-hot rush for her (You see Evie was super busy herself ... typing Dell Dildo's science fiction novel ... on company time) which is why I did all HER work and brought her lunch every day.  But I digress.  So, I told her I'd never finish her project if I had to get her lunch, plus it was already late in the day. Evie reassured me that it was okay and gave me "permission" to stop working on HER/OUR rush to go get her lunch. What could I say? ... tell her to get her own god-damn lunch? ... So, I went to get her lunch. The hamburger stand was right across the street but, it was a large boulevard with no light.  I had to cross Whittier Boulevard, risking life and limb to get there.  Do you know how long it takes to cross the street at 2 pm during rush hour traffic on a big old boulevard waiting for traffic to subside long enough for you to run across the street? It takes a fucking long time!


SO, I get to the Orange Julius.  I place her order and wait.  This was back in the olden days when you had to actually MAKE the hamburger from scratch.  Finally, hamburger made, fries made and now all I had to do was cross the boulevard again. When I got back to the office I handed her her lunch, sat at my desk and started working. Two seconds later she's standing behind me whining ... "there's no cheese on this hamburger". Yes ... this vile creature made me go back to the hamburger stand so they could put the cheese on her frickin' hamburger. By the time all of this was accomplished, it was almost time to go home. But then, just because there was enough time left in the day for one more dose of humiliating degradation, she sent me back again "... to check on her Coke?" ... I'd forgotten her drink.  Remember that scene in 9 to 5 when Lily Tomlin thinks she put rat poison in the coffee?  Don't think I didn't consider it.  

FINALLY, after working in this hell hole for over a year, I found another job. I was hired as a receptionist for ,an electrical contracting firm and they were going to pay me $200 more a month!  I was soooo happy I practically skipped to work the next day. When I approached Evie to give her the news, she was typing a letter, and I said ... "Evie, I'm giving you my notice. I've found another job." She stiffened up ... just a little, then got her pad and pen ... and cool as a cucumber began with the questions ... "Where will you be working?" I tell her, she writes this down. "And what will your salary be?" ... I WILL NEVER, EVER FORGET THIS AS LONG AS I LIVE ... when I told her that I would be making $200 more a month, I literally saw her facial expression form into a tight little pinch as her sphincter muscles simultaneously clenched and tightened up causing her to rise about an inch in her chair.

I don't know what ever became of Evie after I left the savings and loan. I did wish all sorts of terrible maladies on her, from explosive diarrhea to having all her hair fall out ... but I got over that.  Dell "the Dildo" got fired. They caught him ripping off the company to the tune of T.V. sets and all kinds of other audio visual and technical equipment. He was a horrible, prejudiced man.  He once fired an African-American woman for gross insubordination ... trust me ... this lady was never grossly insubordinate.


This was when I learned about real prejudice.  Shocking, unfiltered, ignorant prejudice.  Once, while filming a training video, Mr. Dildo was playing director.  I was to be a teller, and Mary was to be a customer.  Mary was African-American.  Mr. Dildo goes up to his radio-type booth, and walks us through our paces.  Then, he comes down and asks us to do it again because Mary looked to the right during filming and when .... get ready ... when a black person looks from left to right all you can see are the whites of their eyes. 

 


YES.  HE SAID IT.  JUST LIKE THAT.  LIKE IT WAS NOTHING.  She looked at me.  I looked at her.  And we both knew our place.  He was the boss.  He could say things like that and no one would call him on it, or make him answer for it.  EVER.  What I experienced at this company in 1975, I could sue them for today.  Forty years ago the world was a very different place. You could smoke in restaurants, bosses could grab your ass and make lewd remarks, and there was nothing you could do about it. A boss could fire a black employee just because he could, and women were treated really badly.  More amazing than all of this is that Dell and Evie probably have no memory whatsoever of me or Vicky or Carol and the horrible way they treated us and made us feel.  And yet the memories I have of them are so potent that I'm writing about them all these years later.

Hebrews 13:2

Show hospitality to strangers, for by this some have entertained angels without knowing it.

I cite this scripture, not because I feel that I am anything near an angel, but to say that as we go through life we leave impressions on people. These two were pretty despicable and used their position and power to make life really hell, not so much for me, but for two women who were single parents and needed their jobs worse than I did. And I would guess that Vicky, Carol, and I didn't even register a blip on the radar of life to Dell and Evie. But that's okay ... because Someone far more important does remember.

And one day, they will answer ... to Him .... I just wish I could be there to see it.

THE 2026 MET GALA ...

While most of the world is at war, and people are dying, the wealthy have decided to have their yearly party, so we, the have-nots, can see what we're missing.  This has become the most ostentatious, narcissistic event of the year.  The rich celebrating the rich, and it makes me want to projectile vomit all over their beautiful clothes.  

Lauren Sanchez Bezos aka Tits McGee.  Sigh.  How do you sleep at night bitch?  

Nicole Kidman, Queen of the Red Carpet, is trying very hard not to appear broken-hearted.  And she knows it.

Sunday Rose Urban, Red Carpet Queen in Training.

Rebecca Hall and Morgan Spencer.  Very chic-looking couple.  Love their look.

Lena Dunham.  What in the Sam Hill is she wearing?!  Holy shit!  OK ... (1) self-tanner!  (2) THIS is definitely a Glamour DON'T, and (3) how many birds had to die to make this rag?

Zoe Kravitz ... I like it, and I WANT YOUR DADDY.

Nevermind.  I want THIS guy!   DAYUM!

Katy Perry ... she looks like a nun on a motorcycle?  Whatever.  You look stupid.

\

Janelle Monae is wearing miles of cable, a dragonfly, a butterfly, a motherboard, and WTF?!  Is that a drain on your tit?

Joey King.  An actual pretty look.  

 A fly with child.  Don't worry.  She can tell where she's at with her antennas.

Freakin Heidi Klum as the Pieta.  BLASPHEMER!

Stevie Nicks just pulled out something from her Fleetwood Mac days.

Kylie Jenner is wearing a dress that isn't really on or off.  What the fuck is this mess?!  It' stupid, that's what it is.  

Mhmmm ... I'm thinking Shakespeare's a Midsummer Night's Dream?

Flowers and pom-poms and chains OH MY!

Sabrina Carpenter in film.  SMH.

Sombr looking somber.  

Rachel Zegler who obviously does not want to look in the mirror.

Sarah Paulson.  Another one.  

WOW.  A normal-looking girl.  

You need a shirt and lose the makeup.

Kendall Jenner.

A bad ass.

And a badder ass.

Margot Robbie looks bland compared to all these other idiots.

Fashion-forward gal wearing a Jackson Pollock painting.  

I mean, if you really want to be barefoot.  I just hope you don't stub your toe.

Teyana Taylor in head-to-toe tinsel.  

Vera Wang.  You're a designer.  You're too skinny to wear this.  This looks like shit, and you need to gain about 60 pounds of flesh.  JEEZ.

Vera, THIS is how you do it.

THAT'S IT.  I can't take it anymore.  There were so many fucking ridiculous looks, I don't know what to say.  

I'M PISSED ...

So, as some of you might know, I haven't blogged in quite a while other than my Golden Globe and Oscar posts.  Part of the reason was that blogging was a way for me to vent my anger (hence the title of my blog, "From Venting to Viggo").  However, as the country became more and more divided, I was afraid of speaking my truth and being stalked and/or killed for my opinions and of having to read nasty comments about being a libtard, etc.  But then I decided FUCK THAT.  And truth be told, I'm funny AF when I'm angry.  And as most of you might know (I say most because there is still a large faction of the population who are seriously devoted to the Orange One), but those of us with brain cells know that the world is going to Hell, and he is responsible.  I have stored up years of angst and anger, and I've decided to finally unload it and be true to myself!  It's either that or growing a tumor.  

Melania   

The First Lady Puta, and I use that term with the utmost respect, just addressed the nation about her non-existent friendship with Jeffrey Epstein to protect her "good name."  And to that I say, "WHAT good name!" but that's just me.  Anywho, you know, of course, that she speaks seven languages (according to the White House, and she also received a degree in architecture, which we all know is not true.)  She can barely speak English.  But what I found so fucking sanctimonious was her indignation.  I mean, I believe the entire world has seen her completely naked with another lady pretending to be making tha love, girl-on-girl style, and she has the nerve to be outraged that her precious reputation is being ruined by a so-called friendship with a psychotic pedophile.  Hilarious, right?  RIGHT!  

Melania stated in her book (eyes rolling) that "she was proud of her nude modeling."  I don't know about you, but that is something that no one should be proud of.  Especially doing so while their parents are still alive.  I wonder what Baron feels about his mother posing in a lesbian tableau like that.  This is a gal who has no respect for her womanhood.  

She certainly has taken care of herself.  I have conveniently posted before and after photos of improvements she has made over time.  See below and judge for yourself.  

                                                           BEFORE (Meh)

                           AFTER (Pretty, I guess, if you like looking like you can bend spoons with your eyes.) 

All in all, I'd say it was money well spent.  However, as you know, money can't buy you class, respectability, or an education.  I mean, it can buy you an education, just look at Donald.  But you all know what I mean.  Melania just needs to stay in NYC and avoid thinking.  

2026 ACDEMY AWARDS ...

So, let me just say that I am now entering the stage where I don't know who some of these actors are, and that makes one feel old.  I also feel that really good movies today are rare and that is sad to me.  The movie going experience is not what it used to be.  But, despite all that, I am going to do my duty and report on the best and worst looks at this year's Oscars.    

Michael B. Jordan, Oscar Winner looking mighty handsome.  Grade:  A

A classic example of Lycra gone wrong.  And p.s., when you can see a tiny bit of nip, your gown doesn't fit.  Just an FYI.  Grade:  C for cheap.

Heidi Klum.  WTF are YOU doing here!  Your dress is funky, your jewelry looks cheap, and your hair needs a serious redo.    

Kelly Ripa and Mark Consuelos.  They're a beautiful couple, but in person, Kelly Ripa looks like a bone in sequins.  Grade:  A 

Felicity Jones.  This dress is all wrong.  Very few people can wear pale yellow unless you're 8 years old and it's Easter Sunday.  The gown makes her look thick in the middle and does nothing for her.  Grade:  F

Rita Wilson needs to hire a stylist.  This looks like a "mother of the bride" dress she purchased at David's Bridal.  Grade:  F-

Kendall Jenner channeling Jessica Rabbit and/or Chi Chi LaRue.  Grade:  F.

Demi Moore.  LOSE THE FUCKING MORTICIA HAIR AND EAT SOMETHING!!!!

The Princess of Hollywood, Nicole Kidman.  This is a beautiful gown, and amazingly, the same color as her skin.  Her hair and makeup are gorgeous, but can I just say that she kind of bugs the shit outta me now?  Ever since her divorce from Keith Urban, SHE IS EVERYWHERE like she wants EVERYONE to know she's alright.  UGH.  Grade:  A  

Emma Stone.  She always nails it.  She looks fabulous in this beautiful yet simple gown.  WINNER WINNER WINNER!!!  Grade:  A+

Rose Byrne.  GORGEOUS GORGEOUS GORGEOUS!  Sheer perfection!  Beautiful dress, gorgeous hair, and makeup!  WINNER WINNER WINNER!!!!

Grade:  AAA!

Little Katie Hudson in green.  Hate Kate, but she does look really good in this gown that fits her to perfection.  Grade:  A

Zoe Saldana looks quite nice; however, I think a red lip might have added a lot.  Grade:  B

This little lady looks like a perfect Disney princess.  Grade:  A

Anne Hathaway.  On camera, while she was presenting, this looked absolutely beautiful.   I loved it.  Grade:  A

This is a look more for the Grammys.  Slutty Chic.  For the Oscars, this is definitely a NO.  Grade:  F-

Kristin Wiig.  This look is definitely lacking.  Color - BORING, fit - ILL, and makeup and hair could have been a lot better.  Grade:   D- 

Teyana Taylor.  Not sure about this.  She looks great, but is the fabric too furry?  I'm feeling ... skunk?  Grade:  B

Pedro Pascal.  HUBBA HUBBA!  I like it! Grade:  A

... and here she is ... the only woman who can afford a $400 blow out and steam her vagina at the same time.  But, IMHO who also needs some lip filler on her upper lip.  Like really.  You should check that out Gwyneth.  I hate you, so you get an F-

Chloe Zhao, director of Hamnet.  Um.  OK.  It's better than her Golden Globes look.  Grade:  C

Jacob Elordi.  I'd do him in a red-hot minute.  Grade:  A

Timothee Chalamet.  Where's the milk?

Renate Reinsve.  Perfect in its simplicity.  And btw, beautiful legs!  Grade:  A

Jesse Buckley.  Oscar Winner.  Grade:  C 

Infiniti Chase.  Beautiful girl, beautiful gown, very feminine.  Not feeling the hair, but I'll give her a B+

  

Class Couple.  Grade:  A

Melissa McCarthy looking pretty fab.  However, it looks like a beautiful strapless gown worn over a black sweater.  

Fran Drescher channeling Valley of the Dolls, Jacqueline Susann.

Elle Fanning.  Same dress, different event.  I'd love to see her in a COLOR, or just plain ol black.  She looks like a princess though.  Grade:  A

Sigourney Weaver channeling Pat Nixon.  

Adrian Brody.  There is definitely something about him.  Grade:  A

Benicio del Toro.  GUAPO!

Love me some Delroy Lindo!  Such a good actor!

Mikey Madison. Love the look.  Kind of saloon girl, but it looks great on her.  Grade:  A

Well, that's it folks!  Until next year!