ORANGE COUNTY HOUSEWIVES - REUNION PART I ...

SO, caught the RHOC Reunion Part I and can I just say that Tam-Tam did not come off well at all.  She basically sat there with a sneer on her face the entire time (which really brought out the wrinkles around her eyes and if I were her I would get some more Botox … unless it isn’t helping anymore and we’re in need of an eye lift) and she was surprisingly quiet except for the one time she SHRIEKED at Vicki about HER OPINION!!!!  Good God she should have taken a Valium before filming.  I hate her.

Heather and Terry came off very poorly.  Terry came off like another housewife (a man without a penis … maybe he could borrow David Beador’s) and Heather did some serious backpedaling after viewing footage of herself behaving how she insists she didn’t behave, BUT DID.  Can’t argue with that Heather.  When the TRUTH is staring you in the face there ain’t nowhere to go but down. 

The Beadors came off VERY WELL.  Calm and collected.  By their even tempered and calm demeanor they were able to expose the real craziness of the Dubrows and Tamra.  (And where was Eddie?  Me thinks he could care less about supporting his “old” lady.  Didn’t want to be embarrassed by her shrieking and possibly popping a vein on camera.  All the other husbands were there to support their women …. Oh oh Tamra … I don’t knooooooow.) 

Vicki is still delusional.  I have never in my life witnessed anyone in such deep denial about her entire life.  She is still hoping that one day Brianna and Brooks will be best friends and they can all be one happy family.  DELUSIONAL.  Perhaps it's better to just let Vicki continue living in her own private Idaho.   

 

 

Lizzie came off very well and managed to put Tamra down with class and without nary a swear word.  So much so that Tam-Tam did not have a come back.
WOW Lizzie ... you shut Tamra up! 

 
Stay tuned for next week when I'll recap Reunion Part II.  Until next week … SMOOCHES!







 

2014 EMMY AWARDS ....

OK whose idea was it to have the damn Emmys on a MONDAY???!!!  First of all traffic downtown was insane, I didn't get home until late, I missed the entire Red Carpet arrivals ... it ruined my entire viewing experience SO I am merely posting pictures I saw on the internet and giving my comments. 

Alexandra Daddio - what a BEAUTIFUL GIRL!  I don't know who she is or what she's on but she is absolutely gorgeous and I love her gown.  I'm giving her a big fat A!

(on second thought ... she looks kinda naked).



Allison Janey.  She looks beautiful.  Love the makeup and the hair.  The color of this gown is not my favorite but she has a rockin' body and looks great. 

Grade:  B-

  

Christina Hendricks.  What a mess.  The hair is terrible.  The make up is awful, the dress has too much going on and it looks wrinkly and ill fitting.  Looks like a tacky prom dress she bought at Windsor.  She's got too much jewelry on and it clashes with that tacky applique thing on the side of the dress.  Grade:  F-

OK.  The dress is terrible and that thing at the neck looks like a dead lei.  The side panels look weird ... the dress is a mish mash of ideas that didn't quite come together.  Claire, please please hire yourself a stylist.  You're not a bad looking girl but you gotta learn how to pull yourself together.  Grade:  F-

I love love love me some Gwen Stefani!  I love her hair down like this.  It looks sexy and gives her an entirely different look.  However, this outfit looks like a sparkly set of tacky pajamas.  The top .... I'm thinking Star Trek ... and that fabric?  You're better than this Gwen. Grade:  F-

Hayden Panettiere.  Beautiful pregnant girl.  Enough said.  Grade:  A+

Giuliana Margolies.  She always looks very chic, very elegant, very simple.  What can I say - she gets an A.  It's boring ... but it's an A.

Halle Berry ALWAYS nails it.  I don't think I've ever seen her look less than perfect.  Grade:  A+++ WINNER WINNER WINNER.  The rest of you should take notes.  



This kind of looks like Heidi Klum but I can't be sure ... I don't see any boobs?????  This MUST be an imposter. 

MAN CANDY.  Idris Elba YUM YUM.  Elegant, handsome, beautiful.  Grade: A+

 p.s.  (562) 695-4402.  Call me.  Maybe.

Kayley Cuoco.  This is a very pretty gown.  Love the pink and red (it seemed everyone was in red this year) however, something is missing? Jewels? Better makeup?  I don't know ... it is lacking something.  Perhaps a pair of gorgeous chandelier earrings?  The dress gets an A, the overall look ... Grade: C-

 

 

This is kind of sweet.  I'm thinking buttercups and daffodils.  Grade:  B-



 

Amy Pohler - looking very glam!  Love the dress, love the make up, love the hair.  Body is rockin' ... Grade:  A- 

 

Angela Bassett.  A vision in white with gold accents.  Me likeeee!  Grade:  B

 

Anna Gunn.  Mhmmm ... WHITE and BLUE????   Grade:  D-  (at least she won the Emmy). 

 

"My Girls" Anna Chlumsky.  BEAUTIFUL.  This gown has a very 1940's feel.  I love it.  It looks elegant and flowey.  She looks great - not many can pull off white like this.  Grade:  A

 

Edie Falco.  I LOVE this gown!  Love the color, the style, everything.  Edie looks fabulous.  Love the longer hair and her makeup is beautiful.  Winner Winner!!

Grade:  A+

 

Felicity Huffman.  Love this.  Very elegant.  She has a fantastic body.  Though it's simple, it still wows.  The bag is perfection, the bracelet - her hair and makup - she's a winner!  Grade:  A

 

I can't.  I love her and I will not go there.  The bag is nice :)

Giuliana Rancic.  Eh.  Red.  Skinny.  Anorexic.  Grade:  C

 

 

January Jones.  This gal is always taking risks.  The shoes are interesting and the dress is ok however, the hair and the makeup are lackluster to say the least.  I wouldn't be surprised to find a scrunchie back there.  Grade:  C-

 

The gal from Downton Abbey.  I love chiffon.  It's so feminine and ethereal.  It's a pretty gown however it kind of blends right into her skin.  Grade:  C+

 

Julia Louis-Dreyfus.  Same old same old.  Her make up looks good.  Hair good.  However, TAKE A FUCKEN CHANCE ONCE IN A WHILE!  Grade:  B

 

Julie Bowen.  Honey ... prints are NEVER a good idea no matter how skinny you are.  This is plain ugly.  Grade:  F

 

I'm thinking mermaids, something beneath the sea ... YELLOW like an egg yolk.  This entire ensemble is disastrous.  Grade:  F  (Maybe if it was in another color?  Black maybe?)

 

She looks like she's wrapped up in bandages.  And that black and white crap at the top?!  Grade:  F- to the negative of 10.

 

Katherine Heigle is looking very Mother of the Bride in this get up.  Peach?  This is WAY too mature for her.  She has a fantastic body what the hell?  This was a very poor choice.  Grade:  D-

 

 

Kelly Osborne.  Kelly my love, your hair looks just like the Gerber baby except in purple.  The dress - black/grey/white .... one or the other ... not all three.  The tats are distracting.  Grade:  D-

 



 

Kerry Washington.  I'm not feeling this one.  And what's with the skirt underneath the dress?  Kerry ... you usually look so pulled together.  What happened hon?  Grade:  C-

 

Kristin Wiig.  FINALLY!!!!  You look fantastic!  Dress is gorgeous, body is looking fantastic, hair/makeup - flawless.  The only thing is the shoes ... maybe silver would have worked better.  Other than that, you're a winner!  Grade:  A- (for the black shoes).

 

Laura Prepon.  WHAT IN THE SAM HILL IS THIS????  Blue and green with reversible sides, a peplum, a collar, a cummerbund?  What the hell girl?!  Grade:  F -- (another double minus cause this is horrible).

 

I love this gown.  Black with a white train, love it!  Love the neckline too.  Grade:  A

 

Mark Ruffalo and wife.  She looks great.  I think he's adorable.  Cutest Couple!

Grade:  A

 



Melissa McCarthy.  Too much black.  Her hair is black, her dress is black ... she kind of looks like Morticia.  The dress looks very 1980's.  Though I love her, I'm giving her a Grade:  C-

 

Michelle Dockery of Downton Abbey MY FAVORITE PROGRAM EVER!!!!!   I cannot tell you how much I LOATHE this color blocking crap.  The colors are always bizarre!  White/Green/Blue/Light Pink - SERIOUSLY!  Just looking at it is making me car sick.  UGH.  She usually looks great but this is a disaster!  Grade:  F- to the nth degree.



 

 

Peter Dinklage.  GREAT ACTOR.  I know he's a little guy but he's a super talented and he has to be rolling in dough ... Peter!  Couldn't you afford a good tailor?  Those sleeves are WAY too long dude.  Grade:  C-

 

 

 

Sarah Paulson.  She looks like a firework that just exploded.  Hair is terrible, make up is terrible.  Overall look - terrible.  Grade:  F-- (that's a DOUBLE minus).

 

Sarah Hyland.  ADORABLE.  Loved this.  Young, fresh, sweet.  Grade:  A+ 

 

Sofia Vergara.  Same old same old.  I don't like the silver things on the bodice.  Basically, everything she wears flatters the bod and it's always the same ... BORING.  DO SOMETHING DIFFERENT!  Grade:  C-

 

 

Julia Roberts (Meryl Streep's BFF) ... Baubles, Bangles and Beads.  This looks like a dress that has neurofibromatosis (Elephant Man disease) ... Also, did you see how clunky she walks with her skinny horse legs?  SO UNGRACEFUL.  Grade:  F

 

 



Lena Dunham.  Lena ... darling .... we love that you're WHO you are.  WE really do.  But on the Red Carpet do you think you could be somebody else??  This 1950's pink blouse with the frou-frou gradated skirt going from pink to red sitting right at the waist ... not a good look.  You look very uncomfortable.  Grade:  F-F- (that's a double F minus for really REALLY bad). 

 

Well folks, that's it.  Though there were many others to critique and praise mama ran out of steam.  You see I am also busy at work on the RHOC Reunion Part I which I will be posting shortly.

 

So as always, here's wishing you champagne wishes and caviar dreams!

 

SMOOCHES!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

HOUSEWIVES OF ORANGE COUNTY ...

 

I kind of think this might be my last recap on all things Housewives.  I know I know!!  I've said it before but honestly I am getting so bored with the entire franchise.  Maybe I'm just too old to get into the drama of a bunch of 30 to 40 somethings and maybe I'm tired of the "scripted/reality" set ups.  In any event, it's all become so ridiculous and predictable that I can't do it anymore.  I think I've seen ONE New Jersey episode and Beverly Hills is right around the corner and I could care less.   

With all that said I am really looking forward to the O.C. Reunion.  I'm dying to know if Tamra has really been fired (fingers crossed) and secretly hoping that Vicki goes Porsha on Tamra and drags her ass across the floor by her ugly dried up weave!  (Namaste people). 

Heather and Terry Dubrow have really turned out to be a pair of douche bags.  Terry Dubrow lost his shit and called David Beador a penis ... Wow ... he's really gangsta.  And me thinks that Miss Heather really does need to get the stick outta her ass.  Jeez, I bet when she farts she farts in French.  Oh, and Heather ... Tamra is using you.  Just sayin' hon. 

 

Crazy Tamra screaming at Lizzie how "Eddie wouldn't touch her with a 10 foot pole!" ... Maybe not Tam Tam, but that's only because he'd probably rather shag Christian.  Open your eyes Tamster.  And speaking of eyes you should have yours checked out ... I've never known of anyone on the planet earth who could cry without manufacturing any tears. 

Vicki had a baby breakdown saying goodbye to Brianna (who I am sure is still doing cartwheels out of happiness to be away from her cray cray mother) ... I don't feel an ounce of sympathy for that woman she is so shrill and irritating and needs to be locked up in a sanitarium.  However, it was very interesting to see Vicki ALL. A. LONE.  No daughter.  No grandson.  No son-in-law, no son, no husband.  Now she'll have Brooks all to herself so he can lie, lie, lie to her just like like a rug. 



Shannon and David Beador came off very well.  Cool, collected, NORMAL. 
 

And am I crazy?  I did not know that Danielle (Lizzie’s friend) is a “Housewife”????  I thought she was just along for the ride!  Who knew?

 
Stay tuned folks!  … Next week should be a doozie ... Reunion Part I


Heather - snob

Terry - douche

Vicki - delusional

Brooks - crazy

Christian - boring

Lizzie - normal

Tamra - narcissist

Eddie - gay