STAFF CONFLICT AND WORKPLACE INCIVILITY (repost) ...

Consider these telling statistics from a handful of recent studies and surveys:
(My comments are in italics)

Managers said they spend, on average, 18 percent of the time dealing with staff conflict.
(Isn't that part of their job description? MANAGING STAFF?)

Forty-three percent of employees said they've experienced incivility at work, according to the "Civility in America 2011" poll conducted by Weber Shandwick. A Baylor University study found office incivility not only stresses people out during their working hours but also serves as a significant source of strain and strife at home.

Now more than ever, it's critical to find ways to effectively deal with stress and conflict at work. Following are some tips:

Take rudeness for what it's worth.
Being on the receiving end of an unnecessarily sharp barb or inconsiderate brush-off can ruin your day. Why let it? Constructive criticism merits reflection; rudeness does not. So, don't overthink the situation. While you can't control how someone else treats you, you can limit how much it affects you. A person's poor manners or behavior says less about you than it does about him or her.

Or you can do it my way. Keep a box of very sharp pencils on hand and when someone decides to be an asshole simply stick said pencil into said idiot’s eye. He will stop harassing you immediately. Guaranteed.

Don't go it alone.
Opening up to supportive friends or family can be cathartic. Likewise, seeking the wisdom of a mentor or sharing work-related war stories with a trusted member of your network often yields valuable insights and new coping strategies.

Or you car do it my way.  Hire my old neighbor, Ruben, who is an ex-con and will break anyone’s knees for a small fee. Very effective.
 

Rise above the fray.
Pessimism is contagious, and it's all too easy for chronic complainers to bring others down. Don't get caught up in the negativity. It's possible to keep tabs on office undercurrents without feeding the grapevine with additional gripes, groans or gossip. Displaying a toxic attitude doesn't solve anything, but it will likely make you look bad -- and feel worse.

Or, you can do what I do. Bake some cupcakes laced with Exlax and hand out to your more negative co-workers and then wait. Guaranteed for loads of laughs!

Give yourself a break.
You might believe you can't afford to take time off. But can you afford not to? Whether you jet off to a tropical island or do a "staycation," stepping away to recharge your batteries is healthy. Getting some distance and decompressing has a way of putting even your biggest workplace woes in perspective.

Finally, take an honest look at yourself. It's very easy to point fingers and identify others' annoying personality flaws. But what about your own? Try to be more mindful of how your bad habits, moods and behaviors might negatively impact co-workers.

Or you can just say what I say ... I don't have to take a look at myself because I am not the asshole.  YOU ARE.  HAVE A NICE DAY.  DICK WAD.   

                                              
                                                            

The Two Faces of January Official Trailer #1 (2014) - Viggo Mortensen

YOU MIGHT BE MARRIED TO A TIGHTWAD ...

IF, when you have your regularly scheduled hair appointment your husband says ..."BUT YOU JUST CUT YOUR HAIR!" ... YOU MIGHT BE MARRIED TO A TIGHTWAD.

IF, when you return from Cost Co. and your husband asks you how much you spent and you say $46.00 because I needed paper plates and they had a great set of towels for $21.00 but you don't tell him about the $9.00 paperback you also bought ... YOU MIGHT BE MARRIED TO A TIGHTWAD. 

IF, when you tell your husband you're going to Macy's after work to buy Father's Day gifts for your father, your brother and HIM and he asks you ... "how much do you think you're gonna spend?" ... YOU MIGHT BE MARRIED TO A TIGHTWAD.

Yes.  I am married to a tightwad.  His favorite saying?  Count your pennies and the dollars will take care of themselves.  How dorky  is that?  He heard it from Dave Ramsey.    

What I find quite comical is that he is usually more concerned with MY spending habits than HIS spending habits.  So I guess you could say he's a tightwad only when it comes to MY spending.  Case in point:  He had this great opportunity to buy a $10,000 bike for $2,300 (YES.  You read that correctly.  TEN THOUSAND DOLLARS) and he says to me, he says "can I get it?"  And what do you think I said?  I said "yes honey.  You can get it."  BECAUSE I know that when I want something and he starts busting my chops with his questions, questions, QUESTIONS about how much whatever it is that I want is going to cost he'll know better than to say ANYTHING to me because he now has his $10,000 bike and I NEED A FUCKEN SOFA AND A BEDROOM SET SO SHADDDUP!!!

 

POST SCRIPT TO PREVIOUS POST ...

I SWEAR TO GOD!!!  In my last post where I talk about J-Lo and Casper the Friendly Ghost breaking up I WAS going to say that J-lo will be dating someone new ... like yesterday.  Then I thought ... nah ... be nice.  Then I see this on MSN Wonderwall ...  

Is J.Lo dating 'DWTS' pro Maksim Chmerkovskiy?

Look at her looking all sweet and innocent ... like she hasn't effed the ENTIRE WORLD.

 

Let me answer this ... YEAH.  She probably is.  And if she isn't "dating" him, she's dating someone else because J-Lo CANNOT BE ALONE FOR ONE  SECOND.  It's incredible to me ... don't these women grieve?  Mourn?  MISS someone?  She's got to be missing a gene or something because that is just not normal. 

 

When I think of all the nights I cried over some jerk who broke up with me.  Or fretted over breaking someone's heart ... I just don't get it.  That's all.  I have no advice, nothing to say.  No snarky comments.  If you, however, do have a comment, FEEL FREE. 

 

IT'S OVER ...

Don't they look too done with each other?  WOW.  Eighteen years.  Truthfully, I never knew what he saw in her.  However, I like Melanie and I LOVED her in Working Girl.  I can only guess at why they're separating, but if the tabloids are any indication, Melanie has been in and out of rehab countless times and seems to have an addiction to prescription drugs AND plastic surgery ... which, in all honesty, has really fucked up her face.  I'll tell you one thing ... when they first hooked up I was SO JEALOUS.  Antonio was the new hot thing and she got him!  (This was of course WAY before my Viggo obsession) ... with all that said, I always feel bad when a couple divorces ... especially after making a good run of it.  Good luck you two.

And just to be evil... 

Melanie Before ...











Isn't she pretty

 
Melanie After ...

Ay pobrecita. 

 

p.s.  I always thought that STUPID Antonio in the heart tattoo was SO DUMB.

 NEXT ...



Jennifer and Casper the friendly Ghost are separating as well.  He's decided that now that he's heading into junior high he wants to know what it's like to date boys girls his own age.  What a pair of jerks. 

I should probably let you know that this is going to be a snarky post.  Not an uplifting, spiritually wise post.  I'll do that next time. 

 

So I was skimming over the tabloids to find something to snark about and I came upon photos of Kim and Kanye's wedding guests.  This one right here made me want to punch this stupid kid in the throat ...

 

 

Jaden Smith shows up wearing a white batman suit.  To a wedding.  Even Kris is embarrassed and NOTHING embarrasses her!

 

LOOK AT HIM!  What a FUCKING IDIOT! 

 

NEXT ....

 

Maggie Gyllenhaal at the Tony Awards.  OK.  I think she is REALLY talented, but doesn't her face remind you of a baseball mitt?

 

 

And IT'S A GIRL FOR LIL' KIM! 

 

The headline said: 

 

"And guess what she named her?"  Guess?  Mhmmm.  Genitalia?

 

Actually, it's worse.  She named her poor child "ROYAL REIGN."  These folks sure are obsessed with royalty.  Did you know Jermaine Jackson has a son named Jermagesty?  It's true.  Google it.

 

My next post will be a thought provoking, intelligent epistle.  Promise. 

 

Til then ...

 

SMOOCHES!

SANTA BARBARA SHOOTING ...

And the right wing speaks:

 

Joe the Plumber aka Samuel Wurzelbacher, penned an open letter on the website Barbwire, where he explained to the UC Santa Barbara victims' parents that the deaths won't undermine his "Constitutional rights."  I read his letter, and though he does express sympathy and sorrow at the loss of their loved ones and states that he will pray for them, in the same breath he also states ... "But:  As harsh as this sounds - your dead kids don't trump my Constitutional rights." 

 

I have a few thoughts I'd like to share. 

 

What about the Constitutional rights of those kids who were shot down like animals in the street?  What about their hopes and dreams Joe?  What about their futures?  A longed for career?  A dreamed of wedding?  Children?  What about their rights?  You say that their lives, taken at the hand of an insane maniac, don't trump your right to own a gun.  I disagree.  I understand that YOU are a responsible gun owner, BUT as harsh as this may sound ... dead human beings trump your gun rights any day.  PERIOD. 

 

The shooter purchased his guns LEGALLY.  Doesn't that make you pause for even a minute?  The shooter was terribly, mentally ill.  How would a gun shop owner KNOW that?  You can't tell crazy by looking at it.  We live in a very dangerous world that is fast becoming more and more unsafe.  There have been approximately 40 shootings since Newtown.  That is CRAZY.  Constitutional rights are for everyone to enjoy and I consider LIFE far more important than your right to bear arms.  We are not living in 1800's. 

 

According to you, you believe that if everyone were armed we'd be safer.  I don't agree with that.  It would seem to me that if everyone were armed we'd have a nation full of paranoid people who, very likely, might shoot first and ask questions later.  Life and liberty are constitutional rights also and should be enjoyed without the fear of being mowed down by an AK47 because you decided to go to a movie theatre or attend a particular school.  I understand that YOU are a responsible gun owner, BUT, as harsh as this may sound ... dead human beings trump your right to own a gun PERIOD. 

 

You have to at least try to see the other side of your argument.  Violence is much too pervasive in America.  There are mass shootings so often that it is now almost normal.  All the loss of life that leave loved ones left behind to suffer and sorrow for their loved ones who are gone forever.  Why is it so, so important that you have the right to own a gun or an arsenal?  I think it is because YOU are paranoid.  You are afraid.  You are threatened. 

 

I think the world would be a better place if guns were illegal.  Maybe that is not realistic, but something has to be done to stop this insanity.  You say the one thing you never want to go through is what these parents are going through now.  I don't doubt that.  But I also believe that if you did ... if you KNEW how it felt to have your son or daughter mowed down by a crazed gunman your opinion might shift ... in a nanosecond.  

 

I think that sometimes people are so set in defending what they believe that they forget to think.  To really evaluate all aspects of a situation.  They are so unyielding.  But if, in order to promote the greater good, could you give up your guns?  Probably not. 

 

And therein lies the problem.  People who are so unyielding and implacable that change cannot happen.  And there's always money.  The gun lobbies and the NRA are VERY powerful organizations who have pumped gazillions of dollars to candidates who support their agenda.  It's gotten so crazy.  So out of control that reality has become horribly skewed and no one is even able to see it. 

 

So Joe ... I hope and pray you are never touched by gun violence.  I hope your children never find a gun in your home and playing around accidentally shoot a kill a neighbor, or vice versa.  Because it happens all the time, every day, all across America.  People are being killed by guns.  And it's wrong.  Very, VERY wrong. 

THE DIRTY ON KIM AND KANYE ...

Kimye Wedding Venue
 

So last post I said I was going to try to be less a part of all that is nonsense and try to blog about more positive topics that convey wisdom and truth.  However, I did also say that I would continue to dish dirt (on occasion) ... so here is the dirt:

 

The whole world is all a twitter because Kimye is tying the knot this weekend and the ONLY, and I repeat ONLY reason I am blogging about this is because I have fans who expect me to weigh in on the third walk down the aisle for Miss Kim.  So here goes.

 

Word on the street is that brother-from-another-mother, Brody Jenner, is

Dayum, is he cute or what!

boycotting the wedding because Kim did not invite “plus ones” which means Brody can’t bring his girlfriend.  I always hated that when I was single.  I can’t tell you how many invitations I got that were addressed to ‘JUST ME’ … but you know what?  I WENT ALONE to countless weddings and never had a problem because when you got STYLE and CONFIDENCE you don’t need no stinkin’ date!  Anywho, Kim has enough cash to invite the entire state of California, why she couldn’t invite Brody’s girlfriend is beyond me, but whatever, she’s obviously a b*tch with an attitude. 

 

The entire country of Italy is all a whirl because Kimye and their minions have begun arriving daily to the excitement and consternation of many Italians.  I hear the venue was “second choice” because Kim and Kanye were denied permission to marry at the Palace of Versailles (GOD SOMEONE KILL ME). 

 

Next, everyone is wondering WHAT WILL HER DRESS LOOK LIKE?  All I can tell you is  I saw lots of garment bags marked Valentino, but truth be told, Vera Wang is Kimmie’s personal bridal designer (which means Vera will have a lifelong gig).  My guess?  Tits-and-ass a flashing.  I’m guessing mermaid style to show off those fabulous curves and perhaps a gigantic tiara awash in diamonds and pearls.  Personally, I'm picturing something right out of "My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding" ...

Just like a Princess

Perfect for Kendall and Kylie

Putting on such a show for a third marriage to your baby daddy is beyond me but of course we ARE talking about a Kardashian.  No expense is too great.  Perhaps little North will enter flittering in on a pink cloud from above with angels and doves accompanying her.  The mother from hell, Kris Jenner, will either be wearing BLACK or WHITE because all she ever wears is BLACK OR WHITE.  Bruce, ponytail beribboned and in white tie and tails will escort his stepdaughter down the aisle to her Prince Charming and baby daddy, Kanye, who will be dressed in a diamond tuxedo.  Vows will be said, tears will be shed and there will, at last, be PEACE IN THE WORLD. 

 

Thank you Jesus.