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I'll be 55 on my next birthday ... middle aged for sure if I live to be 110. Yesterday I went shopping to try to find an outfit for a wedding I'll be attending. I went to Nordstrom where I always go when I want something "special" but where now, it seems, EVERYTHING is too small ... no matter what size it is. After trying on a multitude of lovely blouses, dresses and tops with no success, I finally sucked it up and wandered over to the "fat lady" department. The gal there looked at me as if I had three heads ... I explained to her that I was much bigger than I look (it's true). She convinced me that everything in that department would be too big for me. Sadly, I'm somewhere between the fat lady department and the XL in the regular departments ... so, after spending $60 on Dior makeup so I wouldn't feel completely suicidal, I went home.

On the drive home I began mentally going through my closet to figure out what I could wear to the wedding. I immediately decided on my usual "uniform" ... black pants, a leopard print top that I would cover with a black jacket. The dress of most middle-aged ladies. Black, black and more black. *Sigh*. BUT, it is what it is. I give-up. I do ... realizing that I'm invisible anyway ... which is also typical of most middle-aged ladies, unless you're Sharon Stone.

I reflected on that shopping experience and on all the young girls shopping and noted that almost every single one of them was carrying a Coach or Louis Vuitton bag. Do you know how expensive those bags are? I couldn't tell if the bags were the real thing of knock offs ... but, considering that Louis Vuitton bags actually come with "papers" like a pedigreed dog, I was certain that if these gals could carry their bags and exhibit the papers proving their authenticity, they would. I don't mean to sound like a hater, but it was disheartening and I can't stand pretension.

I do miss being young and being able to wear anything I want. I miss buying sexy shoes and being able to wear heavy eyeliner and purple eyeshadow and not look like a crazy homeless woman. I miss the days of enjoying a day of shopping and being able to get anything I wanted.
*Sigh* ... but alas, it is life. Once upon a time, a long time ago, I was the young, thin girl who turned heads. But no more ... my time has passed ... it is their time now.

So I give in. You win Father Time.

And I'm okay. A few words of wisdom to you young ones out there ... enjoy it ladies ... it'll go by faster than you think.

THEN ...

NOW ...


  1. Get over it woman!! Your still gorgeous...just ask your hubby or Viggo.


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  3. Debbie dear:
    I hear you sweetheart, but are most definitely just as GORGEOUS now, as you were back in the day, if not more so, inside and out.

  4. I meant frickin' - I frickin love you. My iPhone corrected me

  5. I friction love you, too. : ) Debbie- you are just as beautiful now as you were then, and I'm sure much more beautiful on the inside. It's a different kind of beauty we possess as we age. We just have to get comfortable with it and own who we are now.
    Easier said than done, but ...let's do it!

  6. Deb you are still beautiful as ever inside and out! Do you remember back in the disco circus days guys would yell things from their cars in fact one time at circus they hit the car in front of them? Well I would always tell my mom how discusting I thought it was. She would tell me not to worry about guys yelling things from their cars, it's when they stop then you worry. You are married now to a handsome man and you make a beautiful couple. Come shopping in my closets. I have clothes in every size! :) It doesn't matter what you look like outside it's what is inside that matters. Take care and let me know the next time you are in Vegas.

  7. We've had this discussion before and every one of us can relate. We were, but now we are...I'm sure our mother's went through it and I've no doubt my daughter will go through it. Even Sharon Stone goes through it because no matter how fit you are, you still age and with the age comes other issues. If it bothered us as much as we say, we'd get out and exercise and strive for the Sharon Stone figure. Truth is, we don't wanna work hard. Why? Because we were, but now we are. And there's nothing wrong with that!

  8. Debbie, I totally know what you mean; I'm freakin' neurotic about my looks, too. But you are BEAUTIFUL! Seriously, I think you look better now!

    Eff the weight issue. We make ourselves miserable with that, and it's so stupid. Like I always say, if you wake up in the morning, can walk to the bathroom, can see yourself in the mirror, and can take a proper piss and shit... you have nothing to complain about.

    Thank Jesus, Mary, Joseph, Allah, Buddha, and Bono for your good health AND your good looks. Not to mention that whack-job personality of yours!

    I'll speak for everyone: WE LOVE YOU!!!

  9. Whoah, Debbie.
    We're on the same wave-length here. I so relate to your post. I used to love to run. Knee won't let me. Wear a lot of the same clothes. Etc.

    If only there was some aspect to our society that didn't give you demerits for every day you grow older. The problem is not growing older. The problem is a society that values aging and the aged not one wit. In other cultures the aged where the repository of experience and wisdom, and among the most valued members of society. Not here.

    The problem is a world that has a totally distorted view of what it means to human and what means to be beautiful and valued.

    Oh, about being on the same wave-length? I just posted on blog on a topic related to what it means to be human/beautiful.

    Debbie, you are beautiful, intelligent, funny, thoughtful, and more. That's not a sympathy statement. It's the truth.

    Finally, remember 2007 Miss Carolina Lauren Upton? Young, blond, "beautiful" and valued above all things, including intelligence. When asked during the contest why it was that a fifth of Americans couldn't locate the U.S. on a map, she said:

    "I personally believe that, U.S. Americans are unable to do so, because some… people out there in our nation that don’t have maps, and I believe that our education, like such as in South Africa and the Iraq, everywhere like such as, and I believe that they should… our education over here in the U.S., should help the U.S., er, should help South Africa and should help the Iraq and the Asian countries so we will be able to build up our future.., for our children... "

  10. I promise if I met you, you would no longer feel invisible. Too pretty for words!


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