Tuesday night I left my office at 5:30 pm and went to the parking garage, got into my car, put all my crap on the passenger seat, looked in the mirror on my visor, put on some lipstick, put on my seatbelt, and started the engine. As I backed up my car felt weird and wobbly. FUCK. I have a flat. This is the second flat I've had in the last three months! It's now almost 6 pm. I called Danny and then I called Triple A and they told me they could have a tow truck at my location at 6:45 pm. Wonderful.
So, I sit in my car and wait, and thank God I had my Kindle because I'd rather put a bullet in my head than stare into space with nothing to do for 45 minutes. The tow truck driver called me when he got there. He comes up to the third floor to look at my flat and tells me "oh, that's really flat. You'll have to drive it down because I can't get the truck up here. You'll have to drive VERY SLOWLY."
So, I thump along VERY SLOWLY and get outside where he has the tow truck and he hooks up my car. So I get in the truck. I wanted to go to American Tire five minutes away but it was already closed so he says he knows of another tire shop about 15 to 20 minutes away. So, I say OK. We're driving along for a while when I finally ask the driver "where the hell is this place?" It's up a little way. So, the driver and I make small talk and he tells me about the first time he had to go to an accident on the freeway. He saw a leg and a torso and other body parts and it was horrible. So now we start talking about car accidents. He tells me he once got in a bad accident on the freeway with his ex-wife going 70 mph. They were fighting and she grabbed the wheel and they crashed. She broke her arm, her leg and he got banged up pretty bad, blah blah blah. Then he tells me his ex-wife was Mexican and I tell him that I'm Mexican too so don't say anything bad LOL! He laughs and tells me I look like a white lady and then he tells me he is Arabic, which I totally knew because of his accent.
Finally we turn off on a little street and there, just up ahead on a corner is a tiny, little llanteria. It looks like it is right in the middle of Tijuana and it is lit from above with a tiny light bulb hanging on a wire. I tell myself this does not look good.
The driver gets my car off the truck and I tell the guys there that I need a tire. However, I have to stress that I could not understand their Spanish at all. I have no idea where they were from but their Spanish was unintelligible. Anyway, I call Danny and I let him talk to the guy and he says my tire needs to be replaced and he can sell me a new tire from the ACME Tire Store (sarcasm) and it will cost $130. Danny says go ahead. They remove the bad tire, show me how fucked up it is and then put the new tire on. As I hand the boss my debit card he says they only take cash. Or Zelle. Of which I have neither. I tell him this and he says to me "well, we can take the tire off." DEDUCE: The tow truck is long gone; I'm here all by myself; in the dark; in the cold; in the hood, and you want to take my tire off because I don't have $130 in CASH. KILL ME.
He then tells me that he will send one of his workers with me to go to the nearby 7/11 so I can get cash. KILL ME AGAIN. So, I figure, I gotta do this. So this little guy gets in my car. He's all of 4 feet tall wearing cowboy boots, a leather vest with no shirt and a kerchief (yes, a kerchief) and a cowboy hat. I can only wonder what people were thinking as they saw us together in my car. He directs me to the 7/11. I get there, we both get out of my car and he waits outside while I go in. I get to the ATM and three times try to withdraw $140, and three times I get this message: "transaction invalid," W. THE ACTUAL FUCK! I ask the little Indian man who works there if the ATM is working and OF COURSE he tells me that he is not responsible for the ATM . He doesn't know anything about the ATM. Of course he doesn't know anything about the ATM. So I go back to my car, Jesus and I get in and I immediately start screaming and cursing a blue streak. FUCK!!! I JUST WANT TO GO HOME! YOUR STUPID BOSS SHOULD HAVE TOLD ME HE ONLY TOOK CASH WHEN I FIRST GOT THERE! WHAT AN ASSHOLE! FUCK! I'm pretty certain I was scaring the shit out of Jesus.
Jesus remains quiet and then after I finally shut up tells me to go to Superior Market and they have an ATM. So we go there. Once again, we both get out of the car. He waits outside and I go into the store go to the ATM and AGAIN try to withdraw cash and AGAIN get the "transaction invalid." You know when the Universe just wants to fuck with you? So I call Danny and tell him what the hell! Is there no money in the checking account? He says NO NO there's money in there. He's pissed. I'm pissed. And now, after spending 40 minutes trying to find a place to get this asshole his money, I have to go back to the tire shop and tell him I have no money. I get to the tire shop, tell him I couldn't get any money because my card wasn't working and I don't understand why. He looks at me like I have three heads and tells me he can take the tire off. This is what you call being between a rock and a fucking harder rock. I call Danny. He says stay there. I'm coming to get you. He's in Whittier, I'm in Santa Ana. UGH.
So now it's freezing outside so I go sit in my car and then one of the boss's minions comes over and asks me for something of value to insure I will not take off with his $130 tire. Well, I LOST MY SHIT. I went over to the boss and screamed at him. YOU SHOULD HAVE TOLD ME I HAD TO PAY CASH WHEN I GOT HERE! I LIVE 30 MILES AWAY! IT'S FREEZING AND I'M GOING TO SIT IN MY CAR AND YOU ARE SO FUCKING LUCKY THAT I HAVEN'T TAKEN OFF WITH YOUR STUPID TIRE ALREADY!!!! Next thing I know, the minion has now jacked my car up so I can't leave.
Finally Danny arrives. It is now 9:30 pm. He sees me sitting in the car, LOPSIDED because of the jack and asks the boss why the hell did you do that to her car? What did you think? She's going to rob your tire! He then hands the guy $115 dollars. Boss gets pissed off. It was $130. Danny says you should have told my wife you only dealt in cash when she got here! She had to drive all over trying to get cash to pay for this tire and all you offered was to take the tire off! Boss tells Danny "yo soy trabajador" - meaning I'm just a worker. YEAH YEAH YEAH. On and on it went. Boss finally accepted the money, removed the jack from my car and off we went. We didn't get home until 10:00 pm.
Next day we checked the tire. It was the wrong size. Too small. I am now listing to the right.
GOD ... SOMETIMES I HATE PEOPLE.
