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Saturday, November 28, 2015

BEN CARSON AND THE DONALD ...


Years ago when I was unemployed and had lots of time to devote to my blog I can honestly say that I wrote some of my best stuff.  I wrote some really funny shit.  Now my writing consists of little sound bites if you will, about current events, things that bug me, and the usual B.S. I have to say, nine times out of ten, I KNOW I can write a hell of a lot better but I don't have the time to dedicate to my blog and I just want to get something down so that my blog doesn’t somehow disappear into the ether forever. 


However, it is now time to get serious.  




The Presidential election cycle is upon us and it is a circus.  No sarcasm intended or needed.  It IS a circus.  `



Is THIS what has become of America? Candidates who are unhinged and spouting nonsense? Blathering about pyramids built for storing grain?  Building a wall and bombing the shit outta people?  Really?  We have a bunch of fools  running for president, and a bunch of other fools think they're the greatest thing since sliced bread.  It's embarrassing. 



 



Take Donald Trump ... the man is obviously unstable.  He’s never been a serious candidate and he knows it.  But he doesn’t care because he is enjoying all the attention he’s getting from the blacks and the Mexicans, who, according to him, love him. 

Donald ... I'm Mexican-American and I do not love you.  And sorry to burst your bubble, but none of my people love you either.  You are obviously suffering from malignant narcissism with a smattering of Tourette’s Syndrome.  You have said NOTHING about what you are going to DO for the country and you have no plan other than starting up a database to identify and mark Muslims, building a wall to keep the Mexicans out, and beating up black people who disagree with you because they're obnoxious and need to have the shit kicked out of them.  Your words my friend, not mine.  So yes ... you say you have a plan ... you won't say what it is but it’s a good one.  According to you.

Also, you have quite a messed up record when it comes to marriage and fidelity.  And you know what they say ... if a man can lie to his wife .... just sayin.  First you marry Ivana, a Czechoslovakian girl.  You have three children with her and then you start banging Marla Maples.  Knocked her up (even though Marla got pregnant accidentally on purpose) but you were still an idiot for not using protection.  Whatever.  You marry her for five minutes, then you divorce her and now you're married to your third wife with whom you have a son, Baron.  (Really Donald.  Why didn't you name him King or Prince?  Or Urmajesty ... ) and wife no. 3, the tall, blonde, leggy Melania is from Yugoslavia.  Hey?  Is she here legally? 

You've filed bankruptcy more than I have ... WHICH IS NEVER.  AND, you are a yellow, cowardly bastard who dodged the draft and THAT right there is reason enough for me NOT to vote for you you pussy.  

If I were president, all narcissistic billionaires with orange tans and comb-overs would be rounded up and branded with a mark so others would know who they were .... then, Donald, I'd put you away, temporarily of course, until we had a nice juicy war, whereupon I would call upon you to do me a service.  What was it you said about ISIS?  Oh Yeah ... You'd bomb the shit outta them?  That's the job I'd have you do.  Fight for the country you are promising to make great again and for which you were unable to fight for back in the 1960's when Vietnam was raging because you had a yellow stripe running down your back.  Then I'd keep you there.  Indefinitely.  And then, maybe when your hair turned white, I'd let you come home.  BUT you wouldn't be able to live with the rest of NORMAL society.  We'd have to find a special place for you.  I'll have to think about that for a bit, but I promise, you'd be very happy there.  Maybe I could put provide some Eastern European women to keep you company?  You like them right?  Only these women would be old and have no teeth.      




NEXT ....
 
  Ben Carson.  This fella is really tricky for me.  My question is this ... how can a brilliant neurosurgeon be such a whack job?  Ben … the pyramids were not built to store grain.  They were built as tombs for the Pharaohs.  Did you study history at all?  Now, it seems you’ve also lied about your full scholarship to West Point.  And then you jump on the bandwagon with Donald Trump about video of American Muslims inappropriately celebrating the fall of the Twin Towers on 9/11.  But then you can't be sure WHERE these Muslims were ... in New Jersey or some middle eastern country.  This is troubling Ben.  How are you going to know who to attack, if God forbid, it should come to that?  Afghanistan is not in New Jersey.   



Kasich seems to be the most reasonable.  That’s probably why everyone thinks he’s an idiot.  And oddly enough, I like Rand Paul.  Both these candidates at least KNOW what they’re talking about, and can speak intelligently and with conviction about what they believe and what they want to do for the country.  They HAVE A PLAN. 



Marco Rubio, is a raging hawk and is itching to get into another war. I always find these war-mongering types interesting, especially when THEY HAVE NEVER SERVED IN A WAR. 


Chris Christie blamed campus unrest on Obama’s “lawlessness”.  He reminds me of a boss I used to have.  His only form of communication seems to be to shout insults at people and basically act like a mean gym teacher.  

(And FYI, remember the pledge most of these republicans signed vowing not to go along with ANYTHING Obama proposed.  In any other country that would be considered treason.)



Jeb Bush.  I actually feel badly for Jeb.  He is completely overshadowed by his father, ex-President and ex-CIA director George, and his draft-dodging brother.  He's trying desperately to carve his own way and not really succeeding.  But then again, HE’S RICH so it's kind of hard to feel that bad for him.  

I don't know people.  The GOP has to come up with a game changer because who they've got representing them right now are less than inspiring.  Most of them are misguided religious fanatics who want to persecute all non-white, non-Christian people and that scares me. 

Remember when religion was never EVER mentioned in political campaigns?  It was taboo to even go there.  Now, if you are running for president and are not a devout Christian it is akin to being a Satan worshiper.  Fear is what the GOP banks on and it's exceedingly wrong. 


The views expressed on this site are my own and do not reflect those of anyone else other than myself, the blog owner.

Wednesday, November 25, 2015

A FEW QUICK THOUGHTS ...

GOD ALMIGHTY THIS GUY COULDN’T GET ANY UGLIER IF HE TRIED.  


Kylie is obviously attracted to men who are mentally challenged.



Taylor Swift 

 

Enough with the cat eye liner.  





Gwen  ...

NO.  Just no. 


That's all.

HOPE EVERYONE HAS A WONDERFUL THANKSGIVING!!
 

 

Thursday, November 12, 2015

THE BATTLE OF THE RED CUPS AND THE WAR ON CHRISTMAS …


Every year we get this crazy right wing rhetoric about "the war on Christmas."   There is no war on Christmas people.  There never was and there never will be.  I think the crazy Christians are so determined to be persecuted (about anything) that they make this crap up in order to prove that they ARE, in fact, being persecuted. 

Below is my post from last year ...

BILL O'REILLY'S WAR ON CHRISTMAS


It's that time of year again.  Bill O'Reilly has started his annual fight against the so-called "War on Christmas."

At least that's what the right wing pundits LOVE to say.  However, I do not see any evidence of this.  I see Christmas trees everywhere, and Christmas lights, and Holiday Greetings and Nativities and all sorts of stuff that is related to Christmas.  WHERE is the war against Christmas?  I think it is just something the right wing loves to spew because there IS no war on Christmas and they want us to THINK there is a war on Christmas when NO SUCH THING exists.  If it did, I’d have to move to another country because that would really scare me.  See.  I'm a liberal and I LOVE Christmas.  My office has a Menorah and a Christmas tree.  That doesn’t seem like a war on Christmas to me.  My office building has a gigantic 15 foot Christmas tree with Christmas balls and garland and lights.  That doesn’t sound like a war on Christmas to me either.  So, Right Wing Instigators of Terror, STOP IT.  There IS NO WAR on Christmas.  When you’re arrested for having a Christmas tree THEN I would say, you might have a war against Christmas.  But until then, SHADDUP!


IT IS NOW 2015 ... and the war on Christmas has once again began ...
 
See ... War on Xmas (EYES ROLLING)

Dear Christian People:

You are NOT persecuted.  You will never be persecuted.  Not like Christians were persecuted in the days of Christ.  First of all, I don’t think you could handle that kind of persecution.  Especially considering that there were no internet or cell phone cameras to capture your said persecution. 

You wouldn’t be able to film yourselves being thrown to lions and torn apart by wild animals.  THAT is persecution.  A fucking red cup is NOT persecution.  It's a fucking red cup.  Nothing more.  Nothing less.  Therefore, your persecution is invalidated.  Get that?  NULLIFIED.  WORTHLESS.  STUPID.

So I suggest you put your big girl panties on and get on with it.  Why don’t you start LOOKING FORWARD.  Read the Gospels and ... I don't know .... feed the poor or something?  Love your neighbor?  You know.  That stuff that Jesus said.  Thank you.

NEXT ...

CHRIS CHRISTIE BLAMES CAMPUS UNREST ON OBAMA’S LAWLESSNESS …
 
You mean like gun wielding nutcases shooting innocent people while attending a movie or praying at church?  Lawlessness like that?  Or lawlessness like mmmmm closing a bridge and creating all kinds of chaos because you’re pissed off? 
 
Either way Mr. Christie … You’re eating way too many donuts sir.  The sugar is beginning to affect your brain.
 
 

 
MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!! 
 
(... see ... nothing happened.)
 

Friday, November 6, 2015

MAMA'S IN LOVE!!!!!

It was bound to happen.  My feelings for Viggo have been waning for a some time now ... the refusal to take a photo with me was the nail in the coffin. I mean really people, does he not realize how amazing it is for anyone (specifically ME) to actually see their favorite actor live and in person?  Were you never a fan Viggo?  I purchased a ticket to see your movie, drove to Santa Monica for a screening with a Q&A afterward, and then ACTUALLY got up close ... close enough to run my hand down your cheek and when I asked if I could take a picture you REFUSED.  You did give me your autograph, but still.  I was SO disappointed. WHEN will I ever get another chance to see you in person again?  When will I ever get another opportunity to take a picture with you?!?!  REALLY DUDE?  Do you not know how monumental it was for me to be next to you, IN PERSON, IN REAL LIFE and you couldn't deign to take a picture with me?  It was then I knew it was over. 

It really is like grieving a lost love.  It was beautiful while it lasted but it's over now and I've moved on.  I have a new boyfriend ... A BETTER BOYFRIEND ...

OSCAR ISAAC .... incredible actor ... yummy, dreamy, YOUNG, sexy, Latino, *sigh* ... my new man in my head ... enjoy!

What a chulo!

Mono (doll)








Loves kitty cats

And doggies too

He was in this flick with Viggo and now I love him more than Mr. Mortensen.

I am contemplating renaming my blog.  What do you all think?  Comments appreciated.

NEXT ...

THE CIRCUS BEGINS …

Just had to post a few thoughts on a few of the Republican presidential candidates because … well, they’re always good for a laugh.


Marco Rubio, when asked who he’d like to have a beer with said ... Malala.  Malala, for those of you who have been living under a rock, is the young girl that was shot point blank in the head by the Taliban for wanting to go to school.  She won the Nobel Peace Prize in 2014 and she is a Muslim and a MINOR.

Marco:

1.  Muslims do not drink alcohol;
2.  She is a minor and not of legal age to drink alcohol (also see no. 1 above)
     and;
3.  You're an A-hole.




Ben Carson.  HOW can a brilliant neurosurgeon be so crazy uninformed?  The Egyptian pyramids were built to store grain in?  His reasoning?  He believes in the Bible.  And in the bible it says that Joseph built the pyramids to store grain in.  Yes … it’s there in the Bible ... in the book of Make Believe:12:1 … (not). 


Donald Trump.  (HORN BLOWING) … enough said.