Wednesday, October 29, 2014

HOLA ...

OK ... so everyone on the planet Earth has their panties in a twist because of Renee Zellweger’s face.  Personally I think she looks great.  Better than before.  And I’ll tell you why she looks different – she had her eyes done.  Her eyes were nipped and tucked.  Before they looked closed, now they look open.  I guess it is her prerogative as to whether or not she wants to own up to it, but apparently she doesn’t because she is stating that a “healthier lifestyle" is the reason for her looking like an ENTIRELY DIFFERENT person.  OK.  If that’s how you wanna go.  But we all know she had a little nip and tuck.  Personally, I don't think she looks THAT different.  And personally I would LOVE to have my eyes done.  I have so much sagging skin on my upper lids that soon I’ll need visors to hold up the excess skin.  Renee, before your "healthier lifestyle" you looked like you were right in the middle of a sneeze.  Now you don’t, so good for you.
 NEXT ...
Of course they did.  Chris Martin is 37 and Jennifer is a child.  As talented as she is, she is still only 24.  This is why Gwyneth was somewhat cool about the whole affair (except for the fact that Jennifer is ALSO AN OSCAR WINNER which I'm sure just chaps Gwyneth's hide) ... anywho, I'm fairly certain Gwynnie figured it would burn itself out.  And it did.  So there.  So much for their conscious uncoupling ... P.S.  I still hate Gwyneth Paltrow. 
NEXT ...
I LOVES ME SOME DOLLY PARTON.  Girlfriend has a very large gay fan base and has always been very vocal in her support of the gay community.  She has taken to task Christians who judge those in the gay and transgender community and accuses them of sinning just as badly as others by judging those who are different from them.  Good for you Dolly. 
Douglas MacKinnon Calls For Southern U.S. To Secede As Anti-Gay Nation Called 'Reagan'     
*SIGH* ... these sad SAD people ... they really believe this nonsense. 
Douglas MacKinnon says ... "If you do believe in the Golden Rule, then you're seeing all of this unravel before our eyes daily, unfortunately," he said. "If you happen to make a donation in favor of traditional marriage, you can lose your job. If you happen to refuse to bake a cake for a gay couple because it goes against your religious beliefs, you can be driven out of business."
Really?  Really.
How many cake bakers have been driven out of business because they refused to bake a gay cake????  How many folks have lost their job because they made a donation in favor of traditional marriage?  Really people, you're all just a tad too paranoid.  I say GO AHEAD and form your own nation called "Reagan" ... but do it on some remote island far far away.  Feel free to live in your own Private Idaho in your 1950's world but SHADDUP already!  And when nobody pays any attention to you all and when you have no one to blame for the Ebola virus but yourselves, don't come crying to me.
NEXT ....
So the 2014 General Elections are being held here in California and the advertisements and mudslinging have begun.  Having worked in the field of politics for a short while I can tell you that it is a VERY DIRTY GAME.  I’d tell you where I worked but I’d have to kill you … seriously.  I signed a confidentiality agreement in order to work there hence the price on my head by writing this.  I witnessed some truly pathetic behavior on the part of elected officials that was disheartening to say the least.  It was a real education which bred a deep disappointment in ones fellow man.  Especially the fellow man we choose to lead us … from candidates who begged for endorsements without regard to their pride or convictions to candidates who basically sold their souls and swore to say and do ANYTHING for the organization’s endorsement.  I left that position a much sadder person.  I thought I was cynical, but I realized that I am not cynical.  I am idealistic.  So much so that my idealism was shattered by the lack of conviction and conscientious of so many men and women who run for office.  Do I vote?  I don’t know what difference my vote would make to tell you the truth.  But I also realize that that is what THEY want you to believe ...(THEY being the rich and powerful) ... they want the masses to be apathetic.  To not vote.  To not care.  This attitude allows THEM to run amok ripping and robbing at will.  It’s the same old song … or have I just gotten too old?     

It’s just like the real estate market.  Have you noticed all the Open Houses lately?  Oh yeah.  It’s like 2008 never happened.  People so quickly forget the misery of the economic downturn.  “You better get in now!”  “YOU GOTTA BUY before it’s too late!!!”  “If you don’t get in now you never will!!!” 
It’s almost as though renting is comparable to having an STD punishable by public shaming and banishment from respectable society. 
Here’s what you should do …
1.    Rent;
2.    Save a good down payment;
3.    THEN BUY.
Sadly, here is what most people do …
1.   BUY;
2.   With little or no down;
3.   With a mortgage that no one reads and, if they do, they don’t
      understand it. 
Then you have a CRASH.  It’s inevitable.  But whatever.  Having witnessed this trend many times in my lifetime I DO NOT WORRY about crap like this.  My advice?  Save the required down payment, have at least a year’s worth of income saved up just in case you get laid off and do not spend more than you earn.  AND DO NOT BE ASHAMED OF NOT OWNING A HOUSE RIGHT THIS SECOND.  If you do it right, you will eventually own a home … and you’ll be in a better position when you do.  You’re welcome. 

Saturday, October 18, 2014


As some of you may or may not have noticed, I've been gone for a while.  No blogging for Mama of late.  You see, I had places to go and people to see.   

My nephew Frank, affectionately referred to as "Frankster the Prankster" in childhood, got married.  After graduating college where he met his bride, and establishing himself working as a respiratory therapist in a hospital he decided to tie the knot with Miss Katie.  An adorable, BEAUTIFUL, sweet girl that I love and want to get to know better.  You see, these two live far off in another state so the wedding was my first opportunity to meet my new niece. 

I spent a wonderful few days with my ex-sister-in-law Donna Marie WHO I LOVE SO MUCH and she was unbelievably hospitable and great company.  I hadn't seen her in about 18 years.  Like most folks these days we are friends on Facebook but nothing beats a face-to-face conversation and time well spent.  I've promised to visit again. 

I especially love this picture ...

Katie and her daddy walking down the aisle.  Isn't she pretty!

They were married literally in her front yard, a property on a beautiful lake that was especially fitting for a fall wedding.  I got the feeling that this is what she is all about.  Simple pleasures and family.  The reception took place under a huge tent and the food was fantastic.  Gumbo, fried catfish, shrimp, bacon wrapped chicken ... incredible.  It was a beautiful wedding and I am so SO glad I made the trip.  God bless you both Mr. and Mrs. Martinez.

This was the first leg of my trip.  Back around June I committed to my first girl's trip.  NYC with Laura, Jennifer and Jaime to visit Laura's daughter Paulina who is going to college in New York.  This trip was scheduled for October 9 and I was looking forward to this trip like no other because I've always ALWAYS wanted to go to New York.  So, when I learned that Frank had proposed to Katie on Father's Day this past June I figured that I would have a wedding to attend sometime next year ... 2015.  NOT.  I get an email informing me that they are getting married on October 4.  WTF!  I'm going to NYC on October 9.  How am I possibly going to make two trips???!!!  Well ... I knew I couldn't miss this wedding and there was NO WAY IN HELL I was not going to NYC.  Funny what one can accomplish when one is committed.  NEW YORK CITY HERE I COME ...

There was only one problem.  The second I walked into my front door upon my return from the wedding my throat started scratching ... it was very sore.  Then the congestion, the body aches, the headache, THE COLD FROM HELL!  NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!  As all who know me know ... I'd rather have surgery than get a cold ... I'm in a panic.  Will I be well enough to travel?  How am I going to pack when I feel like shit?!  All I want to do is sleep and I only have two and half days to get ready!  Emails are flying back and forth!  We're due to fly out on the red-eye Thursday night! 

Me:  "Laura!  What am I gonna do?!" 

Laura:  "ATTITUDE.  Half of getting better is attitude!" 

SO, I get up and start moving.  Packing.  Working.  Sweating.  I am not having any fun.  Before I know it it's time to go.  Danny drives us to the airport.  I am not feeling a hundred percent ... I feel as though I am underwater. 

We are meeting up with Jennifer and Jaime at the airport.  I have my Airborne, my vitamin C, my vitamin B12 and I'm popping Cold-Eze like crazy.  Laura and I are hours early ... I like being early because you NEVER know what might happen.  Laura is texting Jennifer ... "where are you?"  "We're stuck in traffic."

It's after 11:00 pm and they're announcing over the loudspeaker for us to start lining up to board. 

Me:  "Laura, where are they??!!"

Laura:  "Don't worry girl.  They're gonna waltz in right as we're boarding the plane. "

AND SURE ENOUGH as we're boarding who come straggling in ... Jennifer and Jaime.  Jennifer is drunky-poo because she went to B.J.'s for dinner and had copious amounts of alcohol.  So she's happy to say the least. 

We are excited as we board.  We get to our seats and settle in and I do my best to sleep.  Jennifer and Jaime are unfortunately sitting behind the crying child from hell who cried for FIVE HOURS. 

We landed at JFK about 7:30 am and then took a car to NYC.  My eyes are bulging.  I'm taking everything in.  I'm excited and at the same time I so want to feel better.  We got to the hotel, left our luggage because the room wasn't ready and we immediately TAKE OFF.  Laura has us running ALL OVER NEW YORK CITY.  I wasn't in shape for this.  I had no makeup, I look like shit, I FEEL like shit but hey ... it's NEW YORK!  We saw Rockefeller Center, Radio City Music Hall, St. Patrick's Cathedral, had lunch and then continued walking for another 17 miles.  After my first six hours in NYC I needed to be intravenously fed and given speed.  BUT ... when we got back to the hotel we TOOK NAPS ... YAY!  After that I felt a whole hell of a lot better!  By the time we went out to dinner I was a new woman.

It was a FABULOUS trip.  We saw so much and ate GREAT food.  Enjoyed "Jersey Boys" with fantastic seats right up front.  Saw Times Square, went to the Met ... NYC is OVERWHELMING.  There is so much to see, so much to do and so much to eat.  The 911 Memorial was an all day event - incredibly moving.  It went by much too fast!

My overall impression of NYC ... I LOVED the vibe.  It is totally not what I expected.  I found the people incredibly helpful and nice, just really great people.  The city really does not sleep.  I always wondered while watching Sex in the City how Carrie felt safe walking home alone at night????  Now I know.  THERE ARE ALWAYS PEOPLE ON THE STREET!  I felt very safe all the time.  I loved the energy, the vibe, the way people get out and enjoy their city.  Great restaurants, great museums, great sites, great neighborhoods, the city was abuzz 24/7.  If I were 30 years old I'd live there!  Of course, one has to make a bazillion dollars to live in the city but dayum, WHAT A CITY!   
(Jamie, Janell, me, Laura, Paulina, Jennifer)

Jennifer, Laura, Me

The beautiful Juliana, Laura and Paulina

Otherwise, who knows when I'd ever have gotten to visit! 

Grand Central Station


One of the chapels in St. Patrick's Cathedral

Jaime, Laura and Jennifer

Jennifer, Laura, me, Jamie

Laura, Jamie, Juliana, Paulina on the streets of SoHo

Me, Juliana, Pauina, Laura, Kenna, Jamie, Jennifer - dinner in Little Italy

A rainy day in New York

Paulina and Debbie in front of the Plaza Hotel

Central Park

Jennifer, Laura and me on the High Line


Jennifer and two of New York's finest

The Pro ... Laura hailing a cab

Laura and I - Jersey Boys

Times Square

Janelle, Jamie, Jennifer, Laura and me - Times Square

911 Memorial Building

The Brooklyn Bridge

Until next time ... SMOOCHES!